whole hell of a lot
the stakes i play poker at are low. not the lowest, but they’re low for sure.
how low? -
i found myself playing hold’em at foxwoods yesterday or yesteryear, it might be 2am. i’ve just been transferred to a new table, we’re playing 8 handed. i’m a fan of getting transferred to this area of the poker room, its the high limit section and that means i can look around and see stacks of black chips that i’ll probably never be able to own myself. its fun to look at other tables around you and see pots in the thousands being pushed around. so for some reason they’ve decided to throw our $4/$8 table in the middle of the $50/$100 and $100/$200 section. we get a few rude comments as everyone finds their seat at our new table – “what the hell do they have you guys playing down here for?” & “you guys playing 2/4?, give me a break.” - the high limit players don’t like the low limit players around them, mainly because we can’t stop staring at them and what they’re playing, it makes them nervous i guess. but we’re there and we just want to play some cards.
the table i’m playing at: everyone has anywhere from $40 to $400 in chips sitting in front of them. our biggest pot size will be $150 or so. average pot size will be somewhere around $30-$60. we’re not seeing any crazy action, but the table isn’t that bad, definitely worth playing at.
then i take a better look at the table just 4 feet to my left. they seem to be playing with chips that i’ve never seen before, which can only mean one thing – they’re worth a hell of a lot. worth a hell of a lot as in each chip is worth 1 grand, 5 grand, or 10 grand each, that kind of hell of a lot. there are also a hell of a lot of chips on the table, a hell of a lot as in more than our entire 8 person table, and they only have 3 players. after many glances i can estimate the value of the table: there is at least 1.6 million dollars on the table. i said ON THE TABLE. 3 people, 1.6 million dollars. now i notice the 3 security guards sort of wandering around our area. now i notice that someone has brought them dinner, and not the kind of dinner normal people can order at the poker table. they’ve got bbq ribs, and lots of them. they’ve got chinese food, mountains of it. they’ve got steaks, 4 of them. and they’ve got onion rings, which nobody touched. and this is just for 3 people, well, maybe their girlfriends as well whom i just noticed are sitting behind them. i also notice that one of them is getting a massage while he’s playing. again, one of these poker players is getting a goddamn massage while playing cards and eating dinner. 45 minutes later he’s still getting the massage. an hour later i see him dig in his pocket to pay the masseuse, he pays the masseuse $50, or, 50 times less than one single chip that he’s playing with, of which he bets hundreds of each hour. where he even found such a low denomination chip is beyond me.
their chips are worth 500 – 12,500 times as much as each chip we’re playing with.
they’ve got $1,598,500.00 more chips in play at their table.
we’ve got about 750 chips on our table. 800,000 of the chips we’re playing with would equal the amount of money they’ve got on the table.
the lowest denomination chip at their table is almost equal to all the chips at our table.
the highest denomination chip at their table is worth about 25 times as much as all the chips on our table.
each pot won at their table is enough to buy a small house, or an extremely nice car.
each pot won at our table is enough to buy a pair of shoes, maybe.
its rumored that one of them lost over a million dollars so far.
its rumored that one of them placed a $250,000 side bet on one hand.
tomorrow these pros will be playing in a tournament that pays just $2.5 million for 1st place (see impossible to win/barely worth it if you do). so you think these guys have any idea how much money they’re dealing with? do they have any concept?
i asked our dealer.
i asked her if she had dealt cards to poker superstars like them before: “yeah, in fact i did earlier tonight. they suck at tipping, let me tell you.” (as she looks behind her to make sure they didn’t hear that). “the problem is that they play with such high denomination chips. they know enough that throwing a thousand dollar chip as a tip is just too much, but they don’t have chips that are worth any less than that, so what are they going to tip with? nothing, that’s what. when i was done dealing my last rotation they gave me all the chips they were using to count the games. ten chips, ten dollars in white (white chips being the cheapest chips in the casino at $1 each). ten dollars. i was pushing pots that were in the hundreds of thousands and they give me $10. so you guys usually tip me $1-$2 a hand on each $30-$100 pot, right? they tip $10 after 20 $50,000+ pots. so essentially you guys tip more than they tip to begin with, not even considering the fact that they’re playing at levels hundreds of times higher than you guys. crazy, huh? i don’t know, its a trade-off i guess, cause how often am i going to be able to deal to phil ivey, howard lederer and jesus Ferguson? probably never again.”
hours later i look back and see the game is breaking up. the players have enlisted their girlfriends to carry the chips for them, nice. you know how sweet it would be to have one of those $1k or $25k chips tossed to me, like what was just done to some girlfriend of theirs? obviously she was flustered by the move because seconds later she drops half a rack of $1k chips all over the table and floor. 50k worth of chips, dropped, spilled, rolling around on the floor, nice. too bad we were in a casino where every camera within eyeshot is focused on this table - nobody makes a move for the chips on the floor. and what would we do with one of those chips anyway? if we went to cash in a $1k or $25k chip we’d just get laughed at, no way those chips get used by anyone other than a handful of well known professionals.
when our dealer leaves we all fork over some $1 chips, totaling $11 – at least we could beat those pros monetarily at one aspect of the game.
now its 4am in the morning, nothing else to do but keep playing.
next time on razyboy.com - playboy, a review.
how low? -
i found myself playing hold’em at foxwoods yesterday or yesteryear, it might be 2am. i’ve just been transferred to a new table, we’re playing 8 handed. i’m a fan of getting transferred to this area of the poker room, its the high limit section and that means i can look around and see stacks of black chips that i’ll probably never be able to own myself. its fun to look at other tables around you and see pots in the thousands being pushed around. so for some reason they’ve decided to throw our $4/$8 table in the middle of the $50/$100 and $100/$200 section. we get a few rude comments as everyone finds their seat at our new table – “what the hell do they have you guys playing down here for?” & “you guys playing 2/4?, give me a break.” - the high limit players don’t like the low limit players around them, mainly because we can’t stop staring at them and what they’re playing, it makes them nervous i guess. but we’re there and we just want to play some cards.
the table i’m playing at: everyone has anywhere from $40 to $400 in chips sitting in front of them. our biggest pot size will be $150 or so. average pot size will be somewhere around $30-$60. we’re not seeing any crazy action, but the table isn’t that bad, definitely worth playing at.
then i take a better look at the table just 4 feet to my left. they seem to be playing with chips that i’ve never seen before, which can only mean one thing – they’re worth a hell of a lot. worth a hell of a lot as in each chip is worth 1 grand, 5 grand, or 10 grand each, that kind of hell of a lot. there are also a hell of a lot of chips on the table, a hell of a lot as in more than our entire 8 person table, and they only have 3 players. after many glances i can estimate the value of the table: there is at least 1.6 million dollars on the table. i said ON THE TABLE. 3 people, 1.6 million dollars. now i notice the 3 security guards sort of wandering around our area. now i notice that someone has brought them dinner, and not the kind of dinner normal people can order at the poker table. they’ve got bbq ribs, and lots of them. they’ve got chinese food, mountains of it. they’ve got steaks, 4 of them. and they’ve got onion rings, which nobody touched. and this is just for 3 people, well, maybe their girlfriends as well whom i just noticed are sitting behind them. i also notice that one of them is getting a massage while he’s playing. again, one of these poker players is getting a goddamn massage while playing cards and eating dinner. 45 minutes later he’s still getting the massage. an hour later i see him dig in his pocket to pay the masseuse, he pays the masseuse $50, or, 50 times less than one single chip that he’s playing with, of which he bets hundreds of each hour. where he even found such a low denomination chip is beyond me.
their chips are worth 500 – 12,500 times as much as each chip we’re playing with.they’ve got $1,598,500.00 more chips in play at their table.
we’ve got about 750 chips on our table. 800,000 of the chips we’re playing with would equal the amount of money they’ve got on the table.
the lowest denomination chip at their table is almost equal to all the chips at our table.
the highest denomination chip at their table is worth about 25 times as much as all the chips on our table.
each pot won at their table is enough to buy a small house, or an extremely nice car.
each pot won at our table is enough to buy a pair of shoes, maybe.
its rumored that one of them lost over a million dollars so far.
its rumored that one of them placed a $250,000 side bet on one hand.
tomorrow these pros will be playing in a tournament that pays just $2.5 million for 1st place (see impossible to win/barely worth it if you do). so you think these guys have any idea how much money they’re dealing with? do they have any concept?
i asked our dealer.
i asked her if she had dealt cards to poker superstars like them before: “yeah, in fact i did earlier tonight. they suck at tipping, let me tell you.” (as she looks behind her to make sure they didn’t hear that). “the problem is that they play with such high denomination chips. they know enough that throwing a thousand dollar chip as a tip is just too much, but they don’t have chips that are worth any less than that, so what are they going to tip with? nothing, that’s what. when i was done dealing my last rotation they gave me all the chips they were using to count the games. ten chips, ten dollars in white (white chips being the cheapest chips in the casino at $1 each). ten dollars. i was pushing pots that were in the hundreds of thousands and they give me $10. so you guys usually tip me $1-$2 a hand on each $30-$100 pot, right? they tip $10 after 20 $50,000+ pots. so essentially you guys tip more than they tip to begin with, not even considering the fact that they’re playing at levels hundreds of times higher than you guys. crazy, huh? i don’t know, its a trade-off i guess, cause how often am i going to be able to deal to phil ivey, howard lederer and jesus Ferguson? probably never again.”
hours later i look back and see the game is breaking up. the players have enlisted their girlfriends to carry the chips for them, nice. you know how sweet it would be to have one of those $1k or $25k chips tossed to me, like what was just done to some girlfriend of theirs? obviously she was flustered by the move because seconds later she drops half a rack of $1k chips all over the table and floor. 50k worth of chips, dropped, spilled, rolling around on the floor, nice. too bad we were in a casino where every camera within eyeshot is focused on this table - nobody makes a move for the chips on the floor. and what would we do with one of those chips anyway? if we went to cash in a $1k or $25k chip we’d just get laughed at, no way those chips get used by anyone other than a handful of well known professionals.
when our dealer leaves we all fork over some $1 chips, totaling $11 – at least we could beat those pros monetarily at one aspect of the game.
now its 4am in the morning, nothing else to do but keep playing.
next time on razyboy.com - playboy, a review.
thrown together by raz at 3:21 PM
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