the resolution list

1) get into lindsay lohan's pants
2) booze it up more often
3) get a 20 question interview with clive owen and/or zach braff
4) buy a digital camera, and
5) get naughty with it in bed
6) quit my job
7) make love to my hand less often, or more often, whichever is easier
8) get the hell out of dodge
9)
10) read 0 nicholas sparks books; except for the one coming out in april
11) find, buy, and redeem gift certificate to fuck playmate of my choice

fuck it, my resolution list is just as impossible as yours and you know it. but i look at it this way, if anything on my list actually happened? well then.