oh nat
when i first met natalie portman i was 24 years old. that was a long time ago. 2 years in fact. this was while nat was going to harvard. i had a friend at work that knew her but he didn’t tell me right off. they had gone to school together. lucky bastard was he.
this friend invites me to drinks one night, which later turned out to be drinks and dinner. with 4 other people. one of them was nat., but i didn’t know this right off.
this friend and i leave work together to meet this group of his friends at grendals in harvard square. nothing about my boring day of work prepared me or made me think that i’d be meeting and hanging out with a movie star later that night. it was all going to come as a big surprise.
lets get one thing out in the open: i’m the shy type. i’m bad at introductions. i won’t remember your name. i won’t even try to be remembering your name, your friends name, your face, your job, nothing. i won’t even look you in the eye when we meet, that’s how shy i am.
so we walk into grendals, the basement place below the pink room, you know where i’m talking about. great place. cheap eats if you get there before 6pm. quiet atmosphere if you get there before 5:30, plus they don’t dim the lights and turn up the music till maybe 6:30 or so. we were in time for all of the above.
we stand at the entrance and search the place out till reno finds his group of friends way back in the far corner at one of the coolest tables in the whole place – i can’t describe it, you’ll have to go there and check it out yourself. anyway, they wave at us, we walk over.
introductions are made for me. me being the only one new to this group makes me way more shy and act way more awkward. i’m staring at the table as the names go around the table. i think i managed to say my name once everyone was done: “hi, my my, na-name is raz.”
once that was over everything was cool because they could go on to their talking and i could finish up my staring at the table and continue fondling my water glass. i’d wipe off the beads of water as they fell down the side of the glass. it was fun, the water catching.
once i got a little less shy i started trying to look up from the table and make eye contact with everyone, i even came close to making my own comments, or at least looking like i was ready for people to start asking me questions. and then someone did.
the next 2.2 seconds:
and if it wasn’t a movie star face that i had seen a million times before on the tv i never would have known who this person was that was talking to me. it was like when you start talking to someone that just got introduced to you, and you’re kicking yourself for not remembering their name, pissing and moaning inside because you’re too retarded to remember a fucking name and why the christ is that so difficult? but by some miracle you’re looking up at this person, confused because normally you shouldn’t know this persons name, yet you do, you know her name, and how is that? how is this possible? its not quite registering that she’s someone famous and that she’s sitting next to you AND SHE’S LOOKING AT YOU AND SMILING AND ACTUALLY TALKING TO YOU RIGHT THE FUCK NOW! the face, the introduction, the fact that you shouldn’t remember her name – yet you do and how the fuck is this possible? why the fuck is nothing registering? 1.4 seconds have passed. the next second or so:
and now the trouble starts, because i was ready, i was def ready, i was ready to start talking and laughing and interacting, i really was. but now i’m royal fucked because THERE IS A MOVIE STAR SITTING RIGHT NEXT TO ME AND ASKING ME A QUESTION WITH A SMILE ON HER FACE. FOR THE LOVE OF GOD MAN SHOOT ME NOW BEFORE I ACT ANY MORE RETARDED!
as if this wasn’t going to be difficult enough before i realized who was asking me a question. not to mention i was moments away from finishing up my water-bead catching, a clear and clean glass was just one more wipe away. stalling is me. mouth open but not saying anything is me. eyes wide open is me. retard look on my face, this is me. this is me for the next 15 minutes, or at least the next 15 seconds.
but maybe it wasn’t that bad. maybe it was better. i just hope it wasn’t worse.
and i have to tell you because you wouldn’t know otherwise:
nat is just the coolest movie star in the entire world. the entire world. yes she was normal. yes she was cool. yes she was really cool and normal. and how is this even possible? i thought movie stars were suppose to be annoying and better than you and stupid and flaunt their money and bodies and be demanding and spotless and perfect and pristine. she was not. how could she talk like a normal person? how could she be sitting in a normal restaurant? how could she know and hang out with normal people? where were her movie star friends and her movie star attitude and her movie star smiles? shouldn’t i be at the next table over, gawking and pointing and snapping pictures of her with my camera that i don’t even own?
but it wasn’t like that, it wasn’t like that at all. it was different and better and normal and fun and interesting and fascinating and just simple.
and then it was just, you know?
oh nat.
that night. but that night. oh nat.
that may be all i can share.
an honest and true story.
this friend invites me to drinks one night, which later turned out to be drinks and dinner. with 4 other people. one of them was nat., but i didn’t know this right off.
this friend and i leave work together to meet this group of his friends at grendals in harvard square. nothing about my boring day of work prepared me or made me think that i’d be meeting and hanging out with a movie star later that night. it was all going to come as a big surprise.
lets get one thing out in the open: i’m the shy type. i’m bad at introductions. i won’t remember your name. i won’t even try to be remembering your name, your friends name, your face, your job, nothing. i won’t even look you in the eye when we meet, that’s how shy i am.
so we walk into grendals, the basement place below the pink room, you know where i’m talking about. great place. cheap eats if you get there before 6pm. quiet atmosphere if you get there before 5:30, plus they don’t dim the lights and turn up the music till maybe 6:30 or so. we were in time for all of the above.
we stand at the entrance and search the place out till reno finds his group of friends way back in the far corner at one of the coolest tables in the whole place – i can’t describe it, you’ll have to go there and check it out yourself. anyway, they wave at us, we walk over.
introductions are made for me. me being the only one new to this group makes me way more shy and act way more awkward. i’m staring at the table as the names go around the table. i think i managed to say my name once everyone was done: “hi, my my, na-name is raz.”
once that was over everything was cool because they could go on to their talking and i could finish up my staring at the table and continue fondling my water glass. i’d wipe off the beads of water as they fell down the side of the glass. it was fun, the water catching.
once i got a little less shy i started trying to look up from the table and make eye contact with everyone, i even came close to making my own comments, or at least looking like i was ready for people to start asking me questions. and then someone did.
the next 2.2 seconds:
and if it wasn’t a movie star face that i had seen a million times before on the tv i never would have known who this person was that was talking to me. it was like when you start talking to someone that just got introduced to you, and you’re kicking yourself for not remembering their name, pissing and moaning inside because you’re too retarded to remember a fucking name and why the christ is that so difficult? but by some miracle you’re looking up at this person, confused because normally you shouldn’t know this persons name, yet you do, you know her name, and how is that? how is this possible? its not quite registering that she’s someone famous and that she’s sitting next to you AND SHE’S LOOKING AT YOU AND SMILING AND ACTUALLY TALKING TO YOU RIGHT THE FUCK NOW! the face, the introduction, the fact that you shouldn’t remember her name – yet you do and how the fuck is this possible? why the fuck is nothing registering? 1.4 seconds have passed. the next second or so:
and now the trouble starts, because i was ready, i was def ready, i was ready to start talking and laughing and interacting, i really was. but now i’m royal fucked because THERE IS A MOVIE STAR SITTING RIGHT NEXT TO ME AND ASKING ME A QUESTION WITH A SMILE ON HER FACE. FOR THE LOVE OF GOD MAN SHOOT ME NOW BEFORE I ACT ANY MORE RETARDED!
as if this wasn’t going to be difficult enough before i realized who was asking me a question. not to mention i was moments away from finishing up my water-bead catching, a clear and clean glass was just one more wipe away. stalling is me. mouth open but not saying anything is me. eyes wide open is me. retard look on my face, this is me. this is me for the next 15 minutes, or at least the next 15 seconds.
but maybe it wasn’t that bad. maybe it was better. i just hope it wasn’t worse.
and i have to tell you because you wouldn’t know otherwise:
nat is just the coolest movie star in the entire world. the entire world. yes she was normal. yes she was cool. yes she was really cool and normal. and how is this even possible? i thought movie stars were suppose to be annoying and better than you and stupid and flaunt their money and bodies and be demanding and spotless and perfect and pristine. she was not. how could she talk like a normal person? how could she be sitting in a normal restaurant? how could she know and hang out with normal people? where were her movie star friends and her movie star attitude and her movie star smiles? shouldn’t i be at the next table over, gawking and pointing and snapping pictures of her with my camera that i don’t even own?
but it wasn’t like that, it wasn’t like that at all. it was different and better and normal and fun and interesting and fascinating and just simple.
and then it was just, you know?
oh nat.
that night. but that night. oh nat.
that may be all i can share.
an honest and true story.
thrown together by raz at 3:24 PM
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