you asked, i'll tell

right, so i know i said i’d get back to you about the date with hot chick last night. i know i’ve posted since and have tried to ignore your constant asking, so now i’ll let you have it. you’re lucky i got done with work earlier than expected today -

so i have 7 different emails asking how the date went with hot chick. who are these people? i started this blog yesterday for christ. 7 different people haven’t even visited my blog yet. i don’t even know 7 different people. hell, i’ve still yet to tell a single person that this blog exists! anyway, the date. i’ll be honest here (for real this time) – the date was a bit of a disappointment at first, but did manage to get better over time. i mean really though, maybe i didn’t have enough time to get excited for it. not enough time to worry or get nervous for it. not enough time to remember that i should have brushed my teeth before leaving the house.

i have to tell you though, she was some excited, you should have seen the smile on her face when i picked her up in my ride (for those of you who don’t know me, i have a sweet ride, to be described in detail later). she was a bit giddy at first, i think she could tell i was rich and was going to take her to some really expensive place that she had only heard about but could never afford. imagine her surprise when we pulled into the ihop in brighton (or is that watertown, or newton maybe? – the one way out there near allston). anyway, i had never been to an ihop....ever. – i never did the nightclub scene in college, which apparently is why i’ve never been. the college roommates of mine used to come home at 4am sunday mornings after clubbing and ihopping, only to puke the pancakes they just ate, this is my only experience with ihop. i don’t tell my hot date about this. i don’t want her to be turned off about any part of our first date, you know? so we sit down in one of those plastic seat booth tables they’ve got and i swear to god she farted when she went to sit down. i know it wasn’t her body rubbing against the plastic cushion seat because she immediately looked at me with those holy-shit-i-can’t-believe-i-just-did-that-will-you-still-pay-for-me-tonight kind of looks. i just smiled and told her i thought it was kind of funny. i told her that i didn’t even think girls could fart, i didn’t think they could do that, and that if they did they probably smelled like flowers or something. moments later it was confirmed that when a lady (at least this lady) farts they do not in fact smell like roses. but she was still hot, the stank did not take away from her hotness.

we talked about what you would usually talk about on a first date. i told her i like to do some things, she told me she likes those things sometimes, i told her we should do those things together sometime, she said that sometime would be a good time to do those things together.

then we ate.

then we were done.

yes, i did pay for her. she insisted i pay.

i didn’t have anything planned for after the dinner bit, me not being the one who really thought of this date in the first place. i thought maybe we should go for a walk along the charles, it being a nice warm night and all. she said that would be “grand.” upon hearing this i just drove her straight home, not being one who ever likes hearing people use the word grand. she got all “i didn’t know that though, how could i have known that?” – but in the really soft and sexy i’m-so-sorry-didn’t-you-notice-i’m-really-hot-and-doesn’t-that-make-up-for-what-i-said kind of voices. once i got close to her house though i sort of understood where she was coming from. that or it was how i noticed she kept on adjusting her breasts every 5 seconds. adjusting as in she went beyond the word cleavage, but just before the word that describes a fully exposed breast.

so she said she was sorry about saying grand, and started to get out of the car when i played hard to get with the boobs onslaught. but then she got back in and asked if she could at least have a kiss. i just sort of panicked and sat there looking at her, the word “yes” or “no” not coming to mind as fast as they should have. i finally managed to say sure, but just a quickie. i told her if i tasted any of that nasty bacon she ate on her lips that it would be the last straw. she laughed at this, but i was for real. turns out her lips still had syrup on them, which was kind of a cool experience and i told her that afterwards.

so the sex was pretty good. i know you want details so here they are: sex with the hot girl was like, pretty good.

there you have it, every last detail of my date last night. hot girl, i’ll be seeing you again soon i hope.